Unbothered & Unapologetic: What I Learned from Manson and Robbins

There’s something deeply transformative about arriving at a season in life where your peace is no longer negotiable.

This clarity didn’t happen overnight. It wasn’t sparked by a single “aha” moment, but rather a gradual realignment—a deep, internal shift that came from years of striving, overextending, and living up to expectations that weren’t always mine.

Two messages found me during that time, and while they didn’t initiate my growth, they affirmed it. They felt less like coincidence, more like divine timing:

• The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fck* by Mark Manson
• Let Them by Mel Robbins

I didn’t pick them up expecting life-altering revelations. But what I found instead were reflections of the woman I was becoming—the one beneath the layers of roles and responsibilities, the one ready to stop surviving and start living in alignment.

I Don’t Have to Care About Everything

Mark Manson’s book offered what I now recognize as permission.
Permission to let go of the pressure to respond to every fire.
Permission to stop performing for standards I didn’t create.
Permission to protect my energy, and not feel guilty for doing so.

As someone who has always led with heart—whether as a partner, parent, student, or team contributor—I took pride in being reliable. But over time, that pride morphed into self-neglect. I blurred the line between compassion and self-sacrifice. I showed up fully for others while showing up only partially for myself.

Manson’s words reminded me that:

Caring deeply doesn’t mean caring about everything. And it certainly doesn’t mean caring to the point of depletion.

So I stopped:

• Over-apologizing
• Over-functioning
• Pouring into people or places that left me emotionally bankrupt

I still care. But I care with boundaries now. And that difference is everything.

Let Them

Then came Mel Robbins’ Let Them. Three simple words that unlocked a mindset shift I didn’t know I needed:

Let them misunderstand you.
Let them judge you.
Let them exclude you.
Let them walk away.

It’s not your job to manage people’s reactions to your growth.

For too long, I curated and contorted. I made myself small to keep the peace. I avoided conflict, smoothed rough edges, and prioritized everyone’s comfort but my own.

Mel’s message was a wake-up call: Peace isn’t found in control. It’s found in release.

I’m not responsible for carrying emotional weight that isn’t mine. I don’t have to convince people of my worth, explain my boundaries, or soften my voice to be accepted.

So What’s Different Now?

The way I live, work, lead, and love looks different today.

I still lead with grace. I still operate with integrity and care deeply about the people and projects I’m connected to. But now, I do so from a place of alignment—not obligation.

I’ve stopped chasing approval.
I’ve stopped explaining decisions that protect my peace.
I’ve stopped burning myself out to prove my value.

I’ve made peace with not being for everyone.

And in that process, I reclaimed the three things I once gave away far too easily:
My peace. My power. My purpose.

If This Resonates…

Maybe you’re in a season of reevaluating too.
Maybe you’re realizing that being everything to everyone is no longer sustainable—or necessary.

If so, let me offer you the same two reminders that grounded me:
You don’t have to care about everything.
Let them.